


The Letter

by InsaneNerdGirl



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Coulvary - Freeform, F/M, Gen, Philinda - Freeform, Philinda Secret Summer, also i still suck at titles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-08
Packaged: 2018-02-03 20:40:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1756539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneNerdGirl/pseuds/InsaneNerdGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the Philinda Secret Summer prompt "Phil Takes Melinda to Asgard"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Letter

**Author's Note:**

> Hey Mina (Philinda Secret Summer buddy)  
> i hope this lives up to expectations! <3
> 
> Not really my favorite thing i've ever written, but i did try.
> 
> Please leave kudos/comments and let me know how i did.

It had been three days.

Three days since they had gone up against Cybertek in a desperate attempt to shut down the organization for good.

Three days since they had been ambushed.

Three days since May had taken a bullet for him.

Three days since he had held his best friend in his arms, begging her not to die.

Three days since he finally told her he loved her; not sure if she’d actually heard him before her eyes closed for the last time.

 

Coulson sat at his desk, staring at the “toolbox” Fury had given him. It had been an enormous help, really… he had high hopes for the future of this new SHIELD he was building.

It just really didn’t seem to matter anymore… not without Melinda by his side.

There was a gentle tap on the door and he looked up to see FitzSimmons standing in the doorway, the former leaning a bit unsteadily against the latter’s arm.

“May we come in, sir?” Simmons asked hesitantly. “Fitz really wants to talk to you… he’s been quite adamant about it and I’m afraid h…”

“Yes, come on in.” Coulson interrupted. If nothing else, he needed the distraction. “What can I do for you Fitz?”

Simmons helped Fitz to the chair on the other side of Coulson’s desk and Fitz sat down. “Tha-ank you, Jemmmmmah!” Fitz said carefully, his words slightly slurred.

Since he’d awoken from his coma, Fitz had had to relearn how to talk and walk and how to take care of himself; and they were still unsure of how much of his scientific knowledge he had retained.

“I’ll be outside when you need me.” Simmons said after Fitz had been situated. “He said he wanted to talk to you alone.”

“Tha-ats riiight!” Fitz agreed cheerfully, waving slightly as his partner left the room.

Coulson’s heart lurched in his chest. What he’d give for his own partner right now. He cleared his throat, swallowing down the lump that was constantly threatening to reduce him to tears. “What did you want, Fitz?” he asked.

Fitz looked down slightly, concentrating on his words. “Jeemmma said that yoouuu’re sad.” He looked up, blue-gray eyes seeking Coulson’s own. “Ssshhe said that your fri-end died.”

Coulson nodded sharply, biting back a fresh wave of grief.

The young Scot continued. “D’you wa-ant to know what I did wheeeeen m’dad died?”

“What did you do, Fitz?” Coulson asked gently. It wasn’t Fitz’s fault that he was only jarring Coulson’s already bleeding heart.

“I-I wrote him a le-etter. I told him allll the things we were gonna do. Theeennn I put it in a spe-special place and it made it hurrrrt less.”

Coulson smiled. “Thank you, Fitz. Maybe I’ll try that.”

Fitz gave him a sunny smile. “Youuuu can pre-tend that your friend reads iiiiit from up there!” he said, motioning vaguely towards the ceiling.

 

 

He had had no intention of writing Melinda a letter, but Fitz’s words clawed at his brain long after the young scientist had left his office. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to try Fitz’s suggestion…

Finally, Coulson pulled a fresh sheet of paper from his drawer and smoothed it out. He thought for a moment before clicking open his pen and starting to write.

 

“Dear Melinda, [the letter ran]

I really don’t know how to start this; but I miss you. I keep expecting to look up and see you walking into my office, or to hear you awake at the tiniest hours of the morning.

I… I don’t really know what to do without you.”

Coulson sat for a moment, pondering Fitz’s words, before continuing writing.

“One of these days you and I should go to Asgard. I’m sure Thor wouldn’t mind showing us around, and I know you and Lady Sif got to be friends, so she would probably be happy to see you. You’ll laugh at me, but I hope they’ll give us some Asgardian clothes to wear while we’re there; I would wear something gray and blue and you… you would wear purple and gold, and you would look more beautiful than all of the gods and goddesses around us.

We’d walk through the city you and I... and I would probably geek out over everything and you’d roll your eyes at me. But I wouldn’t mind.

I’d take you out on a rowboat when the sun starts to set and I’d tell you I love you; and maybe, just maybe, I’d try to kiss you.”

 

Coulson wrote on and on… telling Melinda everything he never got to say to her; coming up with adventures the two of them would have in far-off worlds amongst gods and monsters. Telling her how maybe he would get to be the hero and save her… since he’d been unable to here. Perhaps that’s why he insisted that all of their adventures take place in other realms and on other worlds: because he could save her there.

When at long last he put down his pen he had filled three pages and his eyes were wet with tears; but his heart felt lighter. He carefully folded the pages and pressed his lips against the paper before putting them in an envelope and sealing it.

 

He left the envelope in May’s secret compartment in her cockpit and sat down in her chair. He looked out the window at the hangar beyond, a smile playing on his lips as he thought of how much she had loved to fly.

Time passed, and he fell asleep in her chair; wrapped in warm memories of his best friend.

 

_“Phil.”_

_“Hmmmm?” he answered, not wanting to open his eyes; he was far too comfortable._

_Something wet and sticky bounced off his nose and he sat straight up into the dappled sunshine. Melinda was sitting beside him, dark eyes dancing as she threw another orange slice at his face. He hadn’t seen her this happy and carefree since before Bahrain!_

_She wore a deep purple gown of Asgardian make, and a gold clip kept her hair from falling into her eyes._

_“You know Phil,” she continued, deigning not to throw another orange slice at him in order to take a bite out of it. “Typically when one goes to the Asgardian countryside on a picnic they do not then leave their, as Fandral put it, ‘beloved’ to eat all by herself!”_

_Coulson leaned forward and ate the other half of her orange slice right from between her lips. “Yeah” he said with a chuckle at her glare. “But I’m sure Fandral would take my side if I told him I rowed that boat all the way here.”_

_Melinda rolled her eyes, but couldn’t stop the smile from escaping. “_ You _were the one who insisted on that!”_

_He leaned over and carefully put a grape into her mouth. “Stop talking and let me look at you.” He told her. “You’re far too pretty for me to argue with.”_

_She favored him with an appreciative smile before leaning up against him, her head resting on his shoulder. “I’m glad we decided to visit Asgard,” she said after a moment of companionable silence. “It’s so beautiful.”_

_“Is it?” he asked. “I really hadn’t noticed. I wasn’t lying when I said you’re beautiful.”_

_She tipped her head back and looked up at him. “Is that all you really want to say to me, Phil?" she asked, suddenly serious. “That I’m beautiful?”_

_“No…” he admitted, as he brushed his hand gently against her cheek. “Melinda… you are so important to me. You are my best friend and…” he took a deep breath. “…and I love you.”_

_She smiled softly. “I love you too, Phil.”_

_He bent his head down and kissed her gently, tasting the softness of her lips. She shifted so as to get at a better angle to kiss him back, cupping his face in her hands._

_A sense of urgency entered him and he kissed her harder… trying to show her with this one kiss just how much he cared for her.”_

“Coulson?”

_No… whatever god was trying to interrupt them could go away. He ran his fingers through her soft hair, committing it’s silkiness to memory, savoring the moment as long as he could_

“Coulson!”

_May pulled back from the kiss and looked at him intently. “Always remember, Phil, that you meant everything to me.” She told him softly._

“Agen… Director Coulson, wake up!” A hand was shaking him gently, and he opened his eyes to see Skye standing over him; her dark eyes concerned. “Trip and I have been looking for you for over an hour! Are you alright?”

Coulson sat up, muscles stiff from his uncomfortable position. “I’ll be fine, Skye.” He told his surrogate daughter, giving her a small smile. “I’ll be fine now.”

She nodded uncertainly, but walked out of the cockpit, sensing he needed another moment alone.

Coulson stood up and placed his hand gently over the compartment where his letter to May was carefully hidden. “And you mean everything to me, Melinda…” he said, replying to the Melinda in his dream, “…for forever and always, you mean everything to me.”

 

 


End file.
